Finally...

I think I finally found it...I think I finally found the motivation I needed to get back into a groove of losing weight. Last week, one of the girls that I work with, who has been taking flight lessons, finally soloed. She so cute, she's my little buddy. :) She didnt wanna solo unless I was there to watch. She said she was excited to land because she knew I would be there cheering her on. I think I was more excited than she was! She did a great job and it's been kinda cool watching her journey. She is always talking about it and she is always studying. When she soloed, I felt like a proud older brother. She came back and I was so happy for her. I haven't been able to get her smile out of my head. I haven't been able to shake the desire to feel what she must have felt. I've always had a drive to work out, and try to lose some weight, but this is different than anything I've ever felt in my life...I just cant shake that look on her face out of my head. I want to learn to fly sooooo bad I can taste it. It just HAS to happen. I am going to call the doctor again this week and see what I need to do now to finish the LapBand surgery steps I need to get the surgery done...I NEED to...weight is the ONLY thing holding me back from getting into flying. I work in the perfect environment and I have many flight instructors itching to teach me. I hate starting things I cant finish. I started in 1997...time to finish...I just want the chance...I want to solo, I want to have the liberty to jump in a Cessna and go up north and visit my grandpa and aunt for a few hours and fly home...ya know? I want to own my own airplane some day. I wish I knew why it took seeing her go thru that event to kick me in the ass to motivate me, but I've even lost sleep over it...I just want to capture her emotions and indescribable feelings and experience them for myself. It's been consuming all my thoughts since she did it...I will do this...even though I've been promising to do this forever it seems like, this time it's different...I've been doing it to make others happy and get the attention of others, but this time, it's for ME. This is MY chance to make MYSELF happy...no one else. ME. Good night friends...catch you on the flip side...